Collegiate Times

Jason Brauns, bar manager of TOTS, pours four of the seven liquors in the specially-themed "Green Rail."

T: I liked the fact that I could taste the alcohol in this drink -- I really like Malibu. I could pick up on the banana, but it wasn't an overpowering taste.

If "Ish's Banana" isn't for you (ha), ask for a "Green Gatorade" or a "Strawberry Vanilla Milkshake."

THE LONDON UNDERGROUND

Snap, snap, snap. That's what I wanted to do when I entered The London Underground, but not in the manner of a pretentious intellect; the place is just cool. The attitude is relaxed and the conversational volume modest.

Their six dart boards were all occupied, and I smirked as I watched a player kiss his flight before a throw.

Manager John Bissey was the only person behind the bar, and his customers were thirsty. He existed mostly as a blur, not unlike a Sonic the Hedgehog spin attack, although I highly doubt Bissey has plans to assault his patrons.

With a few spare moments, Bissey grabbed three glasses and carefully crafted his drink. He gave an eloquent description -- the only bar that did, actually -- of the drink's minimalism symbolizing the determined "meat and potatoes" lifestyle of Irish generations past.

"Irish Eyes"

It's worth noting here that Tweety was very full from prior drinks. As he watched Bissey pour our beverages, Tweety's eyes displayed an apprehension suitable for the shores of Normandy. He found it necessary to hype himself up by feeding the jukebox a dollar and blaring Alice In Chain's "Angry Chair."

"Stomach hurts and I don't care," Layne Staley defiantly sang above our heads.

Staley must have had superior digestion, though, for Tweety couldn't finish Irish Eyes.

R: When I say that the simple syrup pleasantly calmed the drink's bite, some of you might think, "Yeah, just like Tylenol calms the pain of a shattered femur." If you're a fan, Irish Eyes is a solid sipper.

L: Whiskey, anyone? Phew. Personally, I'm not a whiskey drinker, but I did enjoy how the minty nuances brought out the natural sweetness.

T: This drink was made to sip and enjoy over time. The mint leaf has a pleasant smell as you turn up the glass, so the first thing that hits your nose isn't the alcohol. The whiskey taste comes across very easily, but you can pick up the hint of sugar and how well it is working with the whiskey.

Winner: PK's with "The Blarney Stoner"

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