Collegiate Times

Dispensing any regard for the law, the weather or the stare of unassuming bystanders, students of every social group unite on Halloween for a celebration of the female form.

Marked by excessive cleavage, translucent apparel and bare butts, most costumes appear to be constructed from no more than a few napkins and require even less creativity. Plagued by the stale “Naughty Nurses,” “Sexy Sailors,” “Seductive Stewardesses” and “Racy Referees” of years past, Halloween has become a predictable parade of fishnets and unlikely professional-wear.

Stand out from the crowd with racy-but-not-lacy costumes that boast your creativity and sense of humor along with your bosom. Easily constructed from things you probably already own, each of these three costumes can be thrown together almost as fast as they will inevitably be taken off. Check in next week for the final Halloween DIY.  

Spider Web: Because if You Spread Eight Legs, You’re Bound to Catch Something

Although gruesome costumes are always noble, they aren’t the most popular among the college audience. Meet halfway with this spider web dress that flaunts your inner gore and your outer “whorr-or.” 

YOU WILL NEED:

- Oversized black tank top (as modified in skeleton costume)

- Synthetic spider web

- Safety pins

- Spider memorabilia: paper cutouts, plastic critters, etc.

HOW TO:

Put on tank top, wrap spider web around it until desired effect is achieved. Pin in place and add spiders.

Skeleton: The Classic Boner

Bone all night with this sexy skeleton dress. Constructed from an oversized tank top stitched down the sides and worn as a dress, all you need is white fabric paint and a clue about anatomy. 

YOU WILL NEED:

- Oversized black tank top

- Needle and thread

- White fabric or acrylic paint

HOW TO:

Pin and stitch down the sides of the tank top so that it is formfitting. Lay flat, stuff with newspaper and sketch a skeleton’s rib cage and pelvic area with white paint. Fill in, let dry and prepare to get your bones jumped.

Christmas Tree: For the Festive “Ho Ho Ho”

Everyone with a knack for fashion knows the trends are decided seasons in advance. Flaunt your keen sense of style and God-given gifts with this Christmas tree ensemble that will have guys pining to dig through your stockings. 

YOU WILL NEED: 

- Stretch fabric

- Synthetic garland

- Safety and straight pins

- Christmas ornaments, Christmas lights, bows, etc.

- Star ornament or card stock cutout

HOW TO:

For the tube dress, wrap a piece of green stretch-fabric around yourself inside out, pinning in place so that it is as tight as possible. Sew along pins, trim away excess material and turn right-side out. Cut at desired length.

Put on the tube dress and wrap yourself in garland. Pin in place. Add strands of lights if desired, make sure plug is accessible and can be plugged into outlet at the party. Avoid spilling drinks and sloppy kissers. Decorate like you would any tree, glue the star to a headband and keep in mind that ornaments can make great earrings.