he said/ she said
He said:
I received a peculiar gift over the holidays that implied I’m both a drunk and an amnesiac, and it wasn’t a calendar marked with upcoming visits to Alcoholics Anonymous.
A stack of 12 “beer bands” — essentially Live Strong bracelets — offer easy identification of drinks by sliding them around the bottle, assuming many similar beverages are nearby. Not only do they vary in color, but they also display suggestive labels. At a party you could avoid unwanted flirtation by slipping on the aqua “tease,” or invite the desperate masses with the pink “slut.” The dude sipping O’doul’s can rock the green “wimp.”
Even though they’re meant as jokes, some people wouldn’t argue the claims. Lasting trends occasionally arise such as vanity license plates or AIM screen names, which compel people to insert generalized self-portraits. Lately it’s snuck into the most popular social networking Web sites to which many of us are shackled. They aren’t really outright declarations, but the content is telling.
You encounter it immediately after logging onto Facebook.
I’m not anti-status, there are plenty of insightful thoughts or humorous links on my homepage, and I appreciate being stimulated in such ways. I shake my head, though, when posts are simply inane or carry irritating themes that breed tags (excessive complaints about a schedule for a certain curriculum: depressed; play-by-play of cuddle time with a significant other: codependent).
Yet considering how much we’re willing to say online, it’s striking how reserved we can be in person. Last week, syllabus reviews were often accompanied by student introductions.
“Tell me a few things about yourself?” the professors asked.
The floor then rumbled with groans and chairs swiveled as friends gazed at one another with synchronized eye rolls. Providing just a hint of personal background is a burden in that context; nervous feet and fingers tap as hometowns and career interests are rattled off.
But I imagine a decent portion of those hesitant folks updated their profile statuses not an hour beforehand with mosaic detail. Had I been Internet “friends” with some of them, I could have added to their remarks, the details of their lunch or, more thrilling, the progress on their laundry.
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