I looked around throughout the day, and I feel that I do not necessarily belong around here. I do not mean belonging to a certain clique or the like -- I could care less about that -- but I am talking about the social status of the students around me.
With the exception of one friend here and two there, plus my immediate family, I am the only person from my life on the Eastern Shore who actually went to college. I have known blue-collar work from the age of 13 and have been involved in hardships no one my age should have experienced.
I lived without heat for a couple days, and the television was not exactly on all of the time. I am not ashamed to say that I have been to the food bank, and I have let pawnshops borrow items throughout my house to pay a bill for a month. But these were commonplace through my life.
Although financial hardships were a daily occurrence in my life, I never really had a hard home life like many people today have experienced. My parents loved me and they took me to museums and national monuments. They spoiled me when I was younger, but I do not ever remember being filled with greed or extreme jealousy when I would see something that I wanted.
I am not saying that I am a poor kid from the beach who has not experienced anything in his life, and I am not saying that someone should make a documentary about me for an A&E special.
I have had my share of the sweet life and I could not complain about my situation now or ever. What I have experienced in my life has made me who I am today because I know what money can do and what it cannot do.
I realize that planning a monthly budget does not include beer, and I expect certain things out of life that need money, however little I may have, to come every month.
Of course, I am not paying for this wonderful college by myself; my mother helps me when she can and I work when I can, but no matter how much money I have, there is another expense that shows how vulnerable my life really is. I do not have a financial cushion like many of the other students here, and this doesn't scare me because it's not that I am in debt in any way, just like many other students here.
I do have to admit that my situation is not entirely horrible. I take advantage of Schiffert since I do not have health insurance, I ask for a student discount wherever I go, and I take full advantage of financial aid as it surely takes care of me.
I know that I am not the only student in the world in this situation, because that would be impossible. There are people struggling today just to make it to college while I have been here for two years and have not paid a cent, yet I am still poor. But the spectrum does not stop there, of course.
There are people like me who get through month-to-month, but an unexpected disaster would knock them to the ground for nearly a year.
There are the students who are privileged to an extent, even a small extent. It is a common stereotype that they drive nice cars and their college experience is funded from a private bank account. After two years, this is what I see in college.
I believe that everyone has their own reason to go to college -- mostly to make money after four or five years doing something they enjoy at least a little bit, or maybe going right back to school for an even higher education -- but what I have not figured out is why I am here. I see myself in neither category.
I do not know what life is going to bring me, although I am prepared to swing back violently at it the best I can. Do I care about internships, classes I do not want to attend, books I do not want to buy, parking in the Perry Street lot at 10 a.m., buses filled to the brim, people crowding walkways, seminars about careers in fields I have no interest?
After deliberating this I can only answer yes to all of the above because people here have made an impact on me. The English department here at Tech has most likely had the greatest impact of all. I can only thank my freshman English teacher for that because I know that I will always belong somewhere.
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